The Super Retro Bros Super Show!
by MoonlightSalsa
Summary: A five-shot fic containing episodes of the Super Mario Bros Super Show, but with Smash Bros characters. Requested by retro mania.
1. Chapter 1

Hi everyone. To start this off, I have to say a few things first.

This is based off episodes from the Super Mario Bros Show from the 80s. This is going to be a five-shot fic and the chapters are in random order. I'm not yet sure if Mario, Luigi and Peach will appear but the main characters are going to be Pac-Man, Mr Game and Watch and female Wii Fit Trainer(Willow).

And lastly, this was requested by retro mania. Hope you enjoy!

"Retro Log Number 1989. We found the Diabolical King Mewtwo's new holiday castle. It comes complete with a pool, croquet, ball pit, greenhouse and us. As prisoners!"

It was an ordinary day for Princess Willow and the Retro Bros. And by ordinary, I mean they were chained to a ball and chain and sitting on a splintery wooden bench, awaiting what Mewtwo was going to do to them. Eventually, he walked out into the neatly-trimmed yard towards his prisoners.

"Well now that I've caught you without much hassle, I think it's appropriate to lock you up for a million years."

"A-a million years!" Gamer sputtered, "what will we do?!"

"Ah, don't worry Gamer," said the forever-optimistic Pac, "There's no way we could live for that long!"

Two Stalfos, led by Captain Falcon, ushered the prisoners to the dungeon entrance.

"Ahright, down yer go." Falcon said gruffly.

"But these are too heavy to carry!" Pac complained, trying to lift up the giant steel ball attached to his foot. It slipped from his grasp and landed square on the Captain's foot.

"YEEEEAAAARGH!" He cried.

"See what I mean?" Pac asked cautiously.

Falcon gestured towards the door. "ANOTHER ONE MILLION YEARS IN THE DUNGEON!"

Clank! "Ouch!"

"Oh!"

"Ouh!" Bang!

The steel balls tumbled down the stairs, Retro Bros in tow. The steel balls landed on every second stair but the two gamers hit their heads on just about every one. Finally, they reached the bottom of the stone staircase. Willow and Kirby waddled up to them. Willow was carrying her steel ball.

"Are you two alright? You took quite a beating from the stairs."

"Oooh, we've been better." Pac sat up dizzily.

Captain Falcon and the two Stalfos clinked down the stairs. "Ahright, ged in there, you four." He ordered. He paused and raised his hand to his head.

"Hey!" he cried, "It's dripping on my head!"

The princess and the Retro Bros watched in surprise as the Captain and the two Stalfos began to decrease in size until they were no bigger than a pebble.

"Yes!" A voice echoed from above, "Shrink, ya scoundrels!"

A girl floated down from above. She had long golden brown hair, Snow White skin and was wearing a floor length blue robe and a pointed hat. She was carrying a fish bowl under one arm and a conical flask filled with a murky substance in the other.

She set the fish bowl on the uneven stony ground, picked up the tiny trio with one hand and dumped them all in the bowl.

"Nooo, Mommy!" A Stalfos cried as they tried to jump up and grasp the lid of the bowl, with no success.

The girl turned to face the Retro Bros and said, "Well, that's that taken care of."

"But...who are you?" Willow asked.

"I'm Stormy the Sorceress," the girl responded, "this used to be my home, until that wretched Mewtwo gave me the boot. But with the help of my special shrinking formula and my magic, I can finally take it back!" She waved her hands around, producing a sparkly cloud that descended over the balls and chains attached to the prisoners feet. The locks snapped off and the four cheered at their feet being free.

Kirby waddled up to Stormy and took the potion, the flask balancing precariously between his stubby pink hands.

"Let's go!"

The party of five marched up the stairs with one goal in mind: to defeat Mewtwo.

Halfway up the stairs, they were suddenly smacked in the face by an awful stench. It smelled like a cross between burnt toast and unwashed cooking equipment.

Outside, Mewtwo was hunched over the barbecue, flipping burger patties. The patties were shrivelled to a crisp. They weren't much bigger than the bowl of a spoon.

"Alright, get your burgers, you lot!" He called. The Stalfos stopped their game of croquet and eagerly lined up with paper plates in hand.

Mewtwo used the metal fish slice to lift up one disgusting burnt patty and plopped on the plate of the first Stalfos in line. It burnt right through the paper and landed on the grass, which immediately began to smoulder.

"We will later celebrate the capture of our prisoners by letting me win a game of baseball." Mewtwo announced smugly.

"No way!" Came a voice from behind him, "the only thing you'll be winning is a first-class ticket to the dungeon!"

Kirby stood triumphantly with the princess and Retro Bros and Stormy beside him.

He dashed forwards but slipped on the grass. The flask flew backwards and smashed over Pac and Gamer. They were shocked to suddenly find everything around them increase in size.

"Well, there goes the formula." Stormy said.

"And there goes the Retro Bros!" Willow added.

Kirby cried out in horror and guilt, and ran towards his princess.

"I SHRUNK THE RETRO BROS!"

"Yes," Mewtwo said, twirling a lasso made of sausages, "Thank you for that." He threw the lasso around Stormy, Kirby and Willow and pulled it tight. He turned to the Stalfos.

"Get the others."

Pac pushed Gamer away. "Run!"

Gamer didn't need to be told twice.

The two of them were chased up and down the lawn, the Stalfos rapidly gaining on them. The bros though the grass would at least help disguise them, but to no avail. All it did was hinder their running speed. As a result, a quick decision was made to split up.

Gamer did a complete U-turn, only to smack right into Mewtwo's toe. He recoiled in horror as the white and purple beast slowly lifted his foot, intending on squashing the tiny 2D man.

"Oh no. Gamer!" Pac yelled from his hiding place behind a croquet ball. Thinking fast, he gave the ball as big a push as he could manage. The ball rolled under Mewtwo's foot, and he tumbled over backwards.

Gamer seized his chance and joined Pac, who was heading straight for a pipe sticking out of the ground.

"In here, quick," the yellow man shouted and the two jumped into the pipe.

"Handy! They must make pipes in all sizes!"

"Speaking of handy…" Gamer said quickly. Pac looked just in time to see Mewtwo's hand in the pipe, pushing down further to reach the Retro Bros. Pac jumped up and ran, pushing Famer away as he did so.

"Give it up, Mewtwo! You'll never catch them!" Willow shouted from where she, Stormy and Kirby were tied to lounge chairs.

Mewtwo laughed deeply. "I do not need to. They will come back eventually to rescue you. And when they do…" He pulled out a spray gun and squirted a cloud of yellowish gas onto a nearby flower pot. The flower inside it immediately began to wilt and droop lower and lower to the ground before cracking like glass. Willow had no words. She and the others simply stared in horror.

Meanwhile, in the pipe…

"Did you just say, 'chew chew chew'?" Pac asked.

"What, no…" Gamer said nervously. The two then became suspicious and turned around. They came face to face with…

"Beetles! I hate beetles!" Pac stated.

"But don't tell them that!" Gamer was already halfway out of the pipe. Pac decided not to stick around.

The Retro Bros once again found themselves running through the grass.

"Pipes, beetles, what's next?" Gamer yelled.

"The exterminator." Mewtwo cast a huge shadow on the ground, making him look even more intimidating.

The Retro Bros' legs were now pushed to their absolute limits, but still they persevered. Eventually, they reached the door of the greenhouse.

"In here quick!" Pac ordered.

"Hey, you're saying that an awful lot, lately." Gamer said.

"Alright, then why don't you say it?" Pack challenged.

Gamer stared ahead at the rapidly approaching herd of Stalfos led by Mewtwo. "In here, quick!" The 2D man yanked on Pac's arm and they sprinted towards the safety of a potted plant.

Mewtwo charged in, but the Stalfos stopped dead in their tracks just outside the door. Their bones literally rattled as the gagged over how many vegetables called the greenhouse home.

Mewtwo slowly trotted around, spraying every plans with the spray gun. The Retro Bros watched in horror as he got closer and closer to their hiding spot.

"What'll we do!" They hurriedly whispered to each other.

Outside, Willow noticed that the lounge chairs they were tied to had wheel. Thinking on her feet, she lurched herself forwards and the wheels did the same. She giggled at this and called to the others. "C'mon guys. Rock and roll!"

Stormy and Kirby followed suit and soon the three of them were rolling down the hill at breakneck speeds towards the greenhouse. The Stalfos never saw them coming. Once they realised what was happening, they were little more than a tangled mess of bones and hideous floral holiday shirts.

The ropes holding them to the lounge chairs had slipped off in the collision and the first thing Stormy did was conjure up a growing potion. Now they just had to wait for the right moment.

When Mewtwo sprayed a certain potted plant, he was delighted to see his prey jump out, holding their noses. He instantly gave chase. Pac and Gamer dodged round a corner and hopped into a nearby watering can, hoping they would be safe.

Unfortunately, Mewtwo saw them. He picked up the watering can with both hands and began shaking it as hard as his arms would allow. The water splashes up the bros' noses and mouths and they struggled to stay afloat.

While Mewtwo was occupied with the watering can, Kirby was in the process of switching the spray in the spray gun with the potion Stormy made. He ducked away in time to see Mewtwo pour the contents of the watering can out and reach for the spray gun.

Pac and Gamer lay against a flower pot with turnips growing in them, completely washed out and too tired to move.

"Say goodbye!" Mewtwo roared with hot as he activated the spray gun. He expected the two to go the same was as the flower from earlier. Instead, he was shocked to find the Retro Bros(and the turnips behind them) grow bigger and bigger and bigger!

Kirby cackled with laughter at his trickery.

"Whoa, we're big again! Thanks Mewtwo!" Pac said, surprised.

"Now," Ganer reached behind him and grasped a turnip. "Take that!" He threw the turnip. It struck Mewtwo square in the face. He instantly turned and ran for the door.

Pac also chucked a turnip. "And that!"

The Stalfos also began to flee, due to their pathological fear of vegetables.

Pax and Gamer stood at the door, arms full of turnips. They swung them round by their leaves before letting go. The Stalfos screamed in horror and ran through the front gate and into the fields surrounding the castle.

Mewtwo was last out, and Stormy decided to perform one more act of revenge.

"Since Mewtwo gave me the boot, I think it's only fair that I return the favour."

She waved her hand around. A boot with wings attached appeared on a cloud of smoke. The sorceress pointed towards the fleeing diabolical King.

"Attack!"

Needless to say, when Mewtwo turned to see a flying boot heading straight for him, he knew instantly what it symbolised and only made him run faster. But not even the fastest runner in the world could outrun this boot. It collided with his back, propelling him forwards.

The party of five stood at the gate and laughed as they watched the whole scene unfold.

"I really owe you guys one for helping me take my castle back." Stormy said.

Pac responded with, "It's no problem. Hopefully Mewtwo won't be after us any time soon!"

Again, the five of them laughed as Mewtwo shouted with pain somewhere in the distance.

"Hello?" Captain Falcon called. He had heard the others screaming and became concerned for his comrades.

The two Stalfos echoed his words but it was hopeless. No one was going to hear three tiny beings trapped in a fish bowl locked in the dungeons...


	2. Chapter 2

The Great BMX Race

 **So sorry this took so long. I honestly kept meaning to finish this earlier but things kept jumping in the way.**

 **hope you enjoy!**

The vehicle traversing the desert was interesting to say the least. It was an old bathtub attached to a bike frame. It looked as though it would fall apart at any second, but it held together quite well. But the most important part was that it serves it's purpose: to carry four persons across the sand.

Pac and Gamer sat on the bike frame, pedalling away. Willow was in the bathtub, watching with glee as Kirby, precariously dangling from the shower head, performed all sorts of flips and tricks. He landed a particularly tricky looking flip and landed precariously on the hot tap, saying "Ta-da!"

Willow clapped with delight, and Gamer, who had craned his neck back to look, also let out a "wow!"

They had yet to realise they were being watched.

The moment they did realise, Gamer had to duck to narrowly avoid a ball of fire aimed for his face.

"Yowzers!"

"Holy ravioli!"

Pac, who was at the wheel, swerved this way and that, trying to dodge the now full-on wave of fire headed straight for them. He did so quite successfully, but when he slammed on the brakes, Kirby, who was hanging on to the shower head for dear life, was flung into the empty sky.

"Kiiirby!" Willow called.

Kirby landed in the bright yellow sand only a metre away from the being who had been spitting fireballs at him and his friends.

"Ch-charizard?"

Charizard stamped both of his feet angrily.

"You owe me sixty gold coins, gumball," he growled.

"But he can't pay you!" Willow shouted, out of breath from having to run over. "Mewtwo took all our money!"

"Well," Charizard said, "maybe you can win the jackpot prize in the BMX race this afternoon." He then motioned to a poster(which was stuck to a cactus) saying that there was indeed a BMX race that afternoon, beginning at three o'clock on the dot.

"Wow!" Pac said, he and Gamer coming up behind Willow, "convenient!"

When three o'clock rolled around and Pac and Gamer were waiting at the starting line as the only ones there, they got a little too gleeful.

"Hehe, maybe we scared them off!" Gamer said happily.

"Yeah, they probably didn't want to-" Pac cut himself off after turning around and noticing a billowing clouds is dust behind them. Out of the dust drive the three other competitors.

Leading the charge was Captain Falcon in a low rider, his eyes gleaming as he smiled evilly.

Next to him, sitting atop a high seat flanked by a Spiny on either side, was Lakitu. His mask was pulled down further than normal to make him seem more determined but instead made his face look more squashed than usual.

Last, but certainly not least, was Skull Kid. His bike was wobbling all over the road because he was more focused on laughing about how he was going to make the Retro Bros eat his dust.

"On second thought," Gamer said shakily, "they scared me off!"

The trio arrived at the starting line.

"Well well well," Captain Falcon began, "look what we have here. Forgotten your training wheels, have you?"

Then he, Lakitu and Skull Kid collapsed into fits of laughter. He laughed so hard that he fell off his bike and hit the ground with a comically loud "OUCH!"

By the time he picked himself up off the ground, Pac and Gamer had already taken off in a cloud of dust, and were already halfway up the hill.

Captain Falcon hopped back on his bike and shouted "After 'em!"

With the squeals of the pedals, they were off.

High up in the hilltop lookout, Willow and Kirby were watching through binoculars and cheering loudly.

Kirby was balancing precariously on the edge of the wall and holding his binoculars with one hand. "They're so far ahead! I sure hope nothing goes wrong!"

Willow scoffed. "Oh please! There's only one person who could stop them now and he's probably miles aw-" Willow stopped as she saw a familiar someone out the corner of her eye.

"Mewtwo?!" What's he doing here?"

Kirby frowned. "Something's not right, princess."

"You're right. Let's go and investigate."

Down in the bowels of the track, Mewtwo had set up a makeshift tent to shield him from the blazing heat of the sun. He now paced back and forth inside this tent, barking out orders to a walkie talkie.

"...so when those two old-school fools reach Dead Man's Corner, nail them!" He cackled.

Willow and Kirby stood behind a rock, listening to every word.

"Another one of Mewtwo's schemes! I should have known!" Willow declared angrily.

"He knew the Retro Bros would enter the face to save me from Charizard!" Kirby said.

"Come on!" Willow urged, starting to break into a run, "we've got to warn them!"

Pac and Gamer had just reached the top of a hill and started to race down the other side at breakneck speeds.

Behind him, Pac heard a gagging noise.

"You okay Gamer?"

Gamer groaned. "I'd feel better if we went back and got my stomach!"

A little ways ahead, Willow and Kirby reached the road, panting and gasping for air. But there was no time to rest, because the Retro Bros were approaching rapidly.

The two waved their arms around screaming "STOP! STOP!" It was fruitless. The bikers zoomed right past and down the track.

"Have they got dust in their ears?" Willow said, out of breath.

"They don't even have ears!" Kirby said. He turned around and froze. "But what about them?!"

The trio of Mewtwo's co-conspirators descended upon them so quickly that Willow only had time to gulp in horror.

Several miles away Pac spotted a building and yelled "Pasta pit stop!" He braked right outside the building. The delicious smell of cooking pasta greeted the two racers.

"But Pac, what about the race?" Gamer asked, a little concerned.

"Pshh, we've got this race in the bag!" Pac exclaimed and pedalled into the restaurant.

Down by the makeshift tent, Willow and Kirby were wound tightly in a huge red sleeping snake while Mewtwo laughed at their futile attempt to stop Pac and Gamer.

"You-you lying double-crosser!" Willow yelled, furious.

"I try, princess. I try." Mewtwo said calmly before picking up his walkie talkie and saying "get ready and go on my command."

The trio had long since surpassed their prey at the restaurant, and were now lying in wait behind a large rock on Dead Man's Corner. They could hear them approaching.

Pax patted his stomach affectionately. "Now that's what I call a meal!"

"And that's what I call ten meals." Gamer muttered. They continued to approach the Corner. They had no idea who was waiting for them.

Mewtwo looked up and shouted "Now!"

Immediately the trio emerged from behind the rock and charged at full speed.

Pac was caught completely off guard. The front wheel of their bike began to wobble violently. Just when he thought he got it back under control, the wheel caught in a stone and the bike plunged over the edge of the cliff.

"Nooo!" Willow cried.

"We're dooooomed!" Gamer screamed.

"No we're not!" Pac stated. He reached into his toolbox and pulled out a game controller. Twirling the cord like a lasso, he swung it up and around. It hooked around the giant rock. Their descent came to an abrupt halt.

"Now I know why it's a gamer's best friend," Gamer said.

Up on the cliff, the trio were laughing about the poor little old-school boys who fell to their deaths. They nearly choked on their own spit when they saw them ride by them, perfectly fine.

Down below, Willow shouted with joy. "Hurray, they made it!"

"WHAT?!" Mewtwo bellowed.

"She said, they made it!" Kirby said.

"Unbelievable!" Mewtwo grabbed his walkie talkie. "Initiate phase two!"

"Got it, boss!" Captain Falcon answered. He then reached down and pulled a lever. Instantly an engine roared to life, bringing more speed and power to the bike. He then zoomed down the track. Lakitu and Skull Kid did the same.

Meanwhile, Willow had managed to squeeze one arm out of the snake, then the other, then the rest of her body. She silently pulled Kirby out and the two of them made a break for it.

The snake, still dozing, wound itself tighter and tighter around nothing until it woke up with a start and smacked its head against the tent supports.

The commotion caused Mewtwo to turn around and realise both prisoners were escaping. He spied a glimpse of pink through the rocks. He pointed at three Stalfos standing idly by and roared "They're getting away! After them!"

The Stalfos instantly turned and ran into the rocks at the same time, causing them to crumple into a pile of bones. Mewtwo sighed. "Why do I have to do everything myself?"

Meanwhile Willow and Kirby had picked up a bike laying nearby and were pedalling frantically to warn their friends of Mewtwo's scheme.

Out on the open track, Pac and Gamer were pedalling as fast as they could. Yet Pac still had time to check his face on the mirror of his toolbox. It was lucky he did, because otherwise he never would have seen the reflection of approaching danger until it was too late.

Pac suddenly turned sharply, just as a Bob-Om landed and exploded to their left.

"Holy cow!" Gamer was startled.

"Anyone for a game of ride-and-die?" Captain Falcon called before he threw another Bob-Om.

That one only barely missed the pair.

Skull Kid laughed evilly before he threw his projectile weapon: a rock-shaped object. Pac and Gamer ducked as it sailed over their heads.

They didn't see it explode into little shards when it hit the ground because they were too busy taunting Skull Kid for having bad aim.

The wheels ran over the shards and both tired deflated due to the holes that were ripped in them.

"Now what do we do? Call a tow truck?" Gamer said bitterly.

"An ambulance would memory appropriate," Captain Falcon pulled up in front of them with a Bob-Om in one hand.

Gamer gulped. Pac said cheerfully, "don't worry, it's two on one! We can take him!"

Captain Falcon was soon joined by Skull Kid.

Pac nodded. "Okay, now it's a fair fight." He didn't need to turn around to know that Lakitu and the Spinies had just showed up. He looked at Gamer. "There's only one way out of this."

Gamer understood. Together they grabbed the bike and spun it around so fast it created a miniature dust storm that was just big enough to obscure everyone's vision.

"Hey, what the-"Captain Falcon exclaimed.

"Where are they?" Lakitu asked.

By the time the dust cleared away, Pac and Gamer had ran down the hill and taken refuge in a vegetable garden. They reemerged with their arms full of zucchini and succotash.

Gamer selected the biggest zucchini and hurled it at Lakitu. It hit one of the Spinies and it fell off its seat. The other two bikers were faced with a barrage of vegetables so fierce they couldn't fight through it. After only three minutes, they all limped off, injured.

"Well, since we're the only ones left, it looks like we win the race by default." Pac said happily.

"It wasn't my fault!" Gamer said. At that moment Willow and Kirby pedalled over. Their faces were red and covered in sweat.

"Stop...don't...Mewtwo…" Willow managed to get out.

"Mewtwo? He's behind this? I knew it!" Pac said.

"Speaking of Mewtwo…" Kirby began.

Everyone turned to see Mewtwo sitting atop a bike, glaring angrily at the four.

"You! You should have ended up at the bottom of the Corner! You always have to go and mess up all of my pl-" Mewtwo stopped as he was struck in the face with a succotash. A zucchini thudded against his chest. He let out a yell of pain as he turned around on his bike and cycled away while trying to simultaneously dodge the incoming vegetables.

Pac, Gamer, Willow and Kirby all stood together in the vegetable patch and laughed at his cowardice. For being the Diabolical King, he sure couldn't survive a rain of vegetables!


End file.
